The Olympic Effect

Chat

The summer olympics happens every four years.  Athletes from around the world come together to compete for their countries and to win medals.

Around the world people watch, cheering on strangers and willing them to go harder, stronger, faster then their opponents.

I love it!

This is my first olympics since my daughter was born and running in “hippie” circles there is criticism of the games.  It’s too expensive in such a fragile ecconomy.  We should be focussed on more important world issues.  The Queen of England is a Nazi.  We place too much focus on sport.

Yes the Olympics cost a lot of money, however the money generated by tourists both during and after the games would out strip that.

You know what, the Olympics gets countries closed off to the west out and competing.  North Korea competes alongside South Korea.  Does it matter that sport is the platform that allows that to.happen?

The criticism of the Queen irrelevant to the games.  And this monarchist dismisses them anyway.  God save the Queen.  I loved her little movie with James Bond, very funny.

What is interesting is the way the games inspire people to get active, join gyms, take up a sport.  Because all we see is the finished product, the win.

What we don’t see is the years of training and the dedication and persistence.

This year I am not inspired to take up any particular sport or new pursuit but to persist with what I’m doing already.

The difference between those athletes who get to the olympics and those who don’t?  Dedication, and persistence.

See take the marathon for example.  Most people think of running a marathon and picture this -

Running across the finishline in glorious victory.  The lone runner running across the line.  Smiling, happy, finished.

That’s not what distance running is about at all.

Distance running is hard.  It’s challenging physically and mentally.  Those who run at the top level get up and train every single day – rain, hail or shine, snow, sleet or storm.  And still the marathon hurts in every fibre of their being.  To get to that finish point there is hours of running, sweating, hurting and mind games.  That’s right your mind begins to doubt whether you can do it long before you cross that magnificent finishline.

No success comes without work.  Not in sport, or parenting, or business, or marriage, or friendships.  No one is going to be interviewed after winning a gold medal and say they just showed up this morning and hey presto!  It took hard work, dedication and persistence.

The difference between failure and a set back is whether or not you pick yourself back up and try again.

J K Rowling famously said that rock bottom became the foundation for her success.

So, anything is possible.  Nothing worth having comes easily and anything worth having takes dedication and hardwork to get.  At first it may seem impossible, but if you think you can’t then you won’t and if you think can then you will find a way.

It’s like running a marathon, you have to block out the negative influences and the loudest and most negative is often your own voice.

I will achieve great things because I believe it, I will show my children that dedication and persistence are more valuable then luck and will get you more.  And in four years time I will be achieving my goals because I am not giving up.

See you in Rio!

Next year things will be hectic

Aside

Next year things are going to be very different.  I just wrote down our weekly plan and BOY OH BOY!  We are going to be super busy.  Work, home business, study, playgroup, MOPS, gym, playdates.  Somewhere we’ll fit in cleaning and cooking.  Oh thank heavens we have the Thermomix!

I’ve got to get a big wall planner I think.  Next year will take a lot of planning but is totally doable.

Busy people get things done.

The kids will love it.  So many different experiences and people, friends and playmates, they will be exposed to so many different learning opportunities and they have each other to share them with.  Brilliant.

It’s going to be all about time management, as I talked about yesterday.

I was thinking about it yesterday, I don’t know how it’s going to look, how I’m going to feel, will it be hectic?  Will I be busy?  Will I be tired?  Will we be happy?

I just don’t know.  So I’m visualizing what could be.  Busy.  Happy.  Loving life.  Getting it done.  Kids happy.  Husband happy.  Kids thriving in 2 day a week daycare.

This leads me to another point.

In spite of my excitment about what is to come in the next 6-12 months, I am getting annoyed with the underhanded comments about my plans to send the children to daycare 2 days a week.  Daycare isn’t a prison, child care workers are trained professionals and I am happy with my choice.  2 days a week.  5 minutes drive from where I’m working.  Shockingly I believe it may even be good for them!  I believe they’ll enjoy themselves!  I know it will work well for us and if it doesn’t we’ll change things.

So where does this leave me?  Nervous, excited, waiting, hoping…  I can’t wait!  Although the thought that my itty bitty baby will be 2 freaks me out just a little bit.

Getting out of the comfort zone

Before I had children I would have defined myself most likely by rank, number, job, posting location, and then my relationships to others.  What I did was clear, I was a sailor.  It was obvious.  I wore the uniform, worked in the appropriate location, spoke the jargon, go the salary.  Simple.  It was a big part of who I am.

Then I had my daughter, left the Navy and the lines became blurred.  I began defining myself by my relationship with others.  I’m Elle’s mother, I’m his wife, I’m having another baby, I’m Elle and Sam’s mother.  I’m a stay at home mum.  Even when I started studying that wasn’t a primary definition of myself.

Before children if I’d studied I would have told people I’m a student and then everything else.  After I had children everything I did for myself became secondary to what I do for others.  It seems as though what I did for myself was just not as important as what I did for my children.

Is this motherhood or martyrdom?

Now there is nothing wrong with defining yourself as a stay at home, work at home, working, studying mum if that’s what makes you happy.  But it wasn’t making me happy.  It was making me feel trapped.  Defined by my relationships and not a person in my own right.

So who am I?

I am Amanda.

What do I do?

Well lots of things really.  I am building my own business and working with others to build their businesses and follow their dreams.  I study full time from home, I’m working on my advanced diploma of naturopathy.  I am reenlisting in the defence force, Army reserves.  Everyone needs a hobby.

What about who you are to others?

Well there are these two adorable, smart, funny, beautiful children who called me either mum or mum-mum depending on which one you talk to I have a husband,  I’m sure he thinks of me fondly.  I have parents, they’re pretty rad.  Sisters.  A brother.  A brother in law.  Soon I’ll be an aunty, I am really chuffed about that prospect.

I guess I think of myself as an attachment parent, because that is essentially what I do.  But I don’t want my whole life and whole being to be defined by the fact that I breastfeed, ocassionally cosleep, babywear, did baby led weaning, use gentle settling techniques etc especially as now that my baby is 18 months old it doesn’t really matter how I fed him when he was 6 months old.

So essentially what I’m saying is this.  Don’t define yourself by the labels given to you by others.  Make your own choices and be proud of who you are and who you define yourself as.  If you define yourself at all.  Reach for the stars and follow your dreams, and take the negative criticism as a challenge.  Those who criticize our decisions and choices do not always have our best interests at heart, and if they do they may just not understand your choice.

But the choices are yours and yours alone.

Life is not about balance.  Balance is about feeling comfortable, and if we never venture out of our comfort zone we never grow and change.

Reach for the stars, that’s where the magic happens.