On Sunday evening while my family and I slept our family car was stolen. I really liked that car. It was my first car. A Holden Commodore 2003 V6. I liked it. It was nice to drive, comfortable, roomy, it was exactly what I was looking for in a car. And not to be vain but I think I looked good in it.
I am only on my learners at present but I was looking forward to a time when I could drive my car with my kids and by myself. I could picture it perfectly. Even down to what song I would have playing the first time I drove by myself. Sad I know.
Fuel by Metallica by the way.
Anywho so we went to bed on Sunday night and on Monday morning at around 5am my husband went to get something from my car so he could go to work… It was gone.
I’ve spent two whole days on the phone to the police, insurance, locksmiths, family, defence housing Australia, working my bum off to get this fixed. It was found Monday night. The gear box is wrecked. It was towed, we’re waiting for police to release it then the insurance agency to assess it. We won’t have it back for a while, if at all.
It’s happening more and more in Townsville. And it’s kids.
I was angry, very angry. I cried and swore and felt like shit for about 48 hours. Why us? Why our car? Why did they have to violate my feeling of safety and security in my own home? Why did they do this?
Then I woke up this morning and it clicked. Because no one loved them enough to know where they were and what they were doing. No one loved them enough to teach them right from wrong. Because they have no empathy for other people, why else would they steal an obvious family car (2 car seats would have been a big give away) and why would they steal the car seats or toss them. They stole the best of the wiggles for Pete’s sake!
They probably don’t go to school, why else would they be joyriding on a Sunday evening. So clearly no one loved them enough to teach them how important an education is to their future.
They probably learnt very early on that to get their parent’s attention they had to act up and now they don’t know how to behave.
I bet no one at home asks them about their dreams for their future, or their ambitions. No one cooks them a special birthday dinner or drives them to early morning band practice.
I bet they don’t have parents who watch, listen, and monitor their activities.
They’ve probably seen that positive behavior is ignored and only negative attention is acknowledged.
I feel sorry for them.
I was blessed with loving parents who cared about me and loved me enough to be involved. So while I wasn’t an angel, I knew right from wrong and I made good choices because I understood that a responsible member of the community doesn’t just think about themselves but the impact their choices make on everyone else.
I don’t believe it’s about whether or not a child is smacked or punished, this isn’t about that. I choose not to spank my children. I don’t think spanking kids will stop them from becoming criminals. I hazard a guess that lots of these kids were spanked, maybe even abused, but I also guess they didn’t receive much positive attention or guidance.
It sucks that my car was stolen, it is a huge pain in the bum trying to fix the mess, but I chose to let go of anger and accept that they made bad choices because no one loved them enough to teach them why they should make the right ones.
So I forgive. I don’t forget though. Believe me. I don’t forget. And I hope they are caught so they can be brought before a court of law and appropriately punished. Police and judges don’t have enough power against criminals in my opinion, they can’t even chase down criminals in a known stolen car.
But anger, bitterness and resentment eat you alive like a cancer. And I let go of that.
So I forgive, I learn from what has happened and moving forward into the future I do not forget.