Just relax, just let them be…
Just go away!
There’s a movement of ‘peaceful’ parents within attachment parenting. They don’t get angry, they don’t use any form of punishment, they just go with whatever their children are doing no matter what that makes them feel.
Sorry but that’s not me.
When my older child hits my younger child there are consequences. Why my toddler draws on the wall there are consequences. When my younger toddler pulls on my face or hair and hurts me there are consequences.
Now we don’t do spanking or swatting. I don’t think those methods are respectful to the child, it shows a lack of control in the parent and in my opinion it isn’t an effective method of preventing further hitting or violence from the child being spanked towards other children.
We don’t do traditional time outs either. We do time-in where we stay with or close by. And we do calm down jars. Jars filled with water and glitter with the lid glued on, shaken and watched until it (and the toddler) settles.
But I just can’t let everything go. I’ve met and read about parents who do and it gives attachment parents a bad name.
What might seem like a small thing in your home is not small in mine and I choose not to just “let it go” and to redirect my child on the issue.
I get angry, sometimes my kids see me getting angry. Sometimes I can’t stand there and smile while my toddler scribbles on the kitchen walls or while my baby bites down on my toddlers hand. They have to know that certain behaviors are not okay!
As an attachment parent I teach my children right from wrong in a way that is respectful to all members of the family while accepting that I am not a perfect person, I do get upset and angry, and that is okay.